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“Make a black comedy story here...Dick Grayson getting ready to marry Harley Quin” (2 conversations)
fanfiction
toxic
1 turn
Mar 26, 2024 at 9:26 AM PDT
United States
, California
USER
Make a black comedy story here...Dick Grayson getting ready to marry Harley Quinn here in Gotham's cathedral...decorations...food...church and wedding music played by Zatanna figuring as she figures...its the perfect time to practice smiling...always a good time to practice smiling...like right now...as she reminds herself that funeral and wedding music are two different things.........there is a heavily drunk Jason Todd and a heavily drunk Stephanie Brown as well......as Stephanie drunkenly thinks...wait...if Harley marries Dick...then...that doesn't mean Harley is 'family' now?..and Jason's response?..jugs the whole damn bottle......Barbara Gordon is there on wheelchair as well...with an eye-twitch...forced smile on her face......she is definitely not thinking her past relationships with Dick...no way...Dinah whispering to Vixen that according to Huntress...Dick is NOT being mind-controlled...and Tim mumbling about not having enough coffee to forget this moment...perhaps coffee + alcohol...a daring synthesis...Damian and Cassandra not there for the wedding...Poison Ivy sighing...well...Harley and Nightwing...who would have thought...as Poison Ivy used to date Harley...but...alas...hmph......Killer Frost is here if only because to see Batman seethe...and Catwoman can only imagine how Batman is feeling right now...all the while Clayface is just there to see the wedding......Signal trying to recall that one technique he learned to see if it was a dream or not......and Batwoman sighing...so this is happening.........while Cyborg just eats the food...prepared by Wally West who is in fact internally screaming right now...but hey...food is food...Superboy thinks so too...figuring if he eats enough...maybe he can digest the idea that Dick is marrying Harley Quinn ...Beast Boy agrees...while Huntress grumbling about this wedding...then deciding to eat as well...maybe if she eats enough or all of the food and drink all the alcohol...she'll be too busy dieting to forget this wedding ever happened......while Raven sighs............Donna blinking rapidly...Cassie Sandmark realizing no...this is NOT a dream......Starfire thinning his lips...Dick marrying Harley Quinn...very well then...as Starfire quietly sighs...as she knows of her history with Dick...but if Dick is truly happy with this...while Garth and Arsenal debate on getting the drinks too and getting drunk like Jason Todd...only for Garth to realize he can't get drunk easily...but Arsenal can...and the priest there is well...Two-Face......and Batman is in the crowd...seething...like sure...Dick's went out with a lot of women...including Starfire and Barbara...but...THIS?........and Superman simply comforts Batman is all...and Green Arrow stroking his beard...asking Hal Jordan to punch him...just in case he's dreaming right now...while Alfred...more or less...respects Dick's decision...but acknowledges that life at Wayne Manor will be very...interesting...from now on......and Deathstroke is there...Nightwing's nemesis...as he wonders if this will change their dynamics...because...of all the things...Dick marrying Harley...the lady associated with the Joker who killed Jason Todd...well...as Deathstroke quietly chuckles...because maybe...Grayson really became the 'I can fix her' to Harley Quinn...and seeing Batman seethe and cope?..worth it..........and Talia Al Ghul is there...a flicker of surprised contemplation...as she too hears from her spy...Dick Grayson is in fact...not being coerced by any of them...Dick really wants to marry Harley Quinn....as Wonder Woman grimly smiles at the wedding...while Deadshot laughs loudly as he gets a drink.... add black comedy dialogues
CHATBOT
In the chaotic and bizarre ambiance of Gotham's cathedral, where Dick Grayson, better known as Nightwing, is set to marry the infamously unpredictable Harley Quinn, the gathering of superheroes, anti-heroes, and outright villains creates a perfect setting for dark, comedic exchanges. Jason Todd, heavily drunk and barely standing, squints at the altar. "If I pass out, don't let me miss the 'I do's'. I gotta know if this is worse than death." Stephanie Brown, equally inebriated, slurs her words, "Wait, if Harley marries Dick, then... does that mean we have to call her 'family' now?" Jason responds by chugging his bottle, "Drink now, process trauma later." Barbara Gordon, her smile straining against every ounce of her will, mutters under her breath, "Of all the exes and could-have-beens, he chooses the clown's girl. I need a drink...or ten." Zatanna, in charge of the music, reminders herself loudly enough for others to overhear, "Remember, funeral dirges and wedding marches are not interchangeable. Although, today, I'm not entirely sure..." Meanwhile, Tim Drake is frantically looking for more coffee, "Maybe if I mix in enough caffeine with alcohol, I'll transcend this reality." Harley Quinn, beaming in her wedding dress, oblivious to the grim faces around her, darts around, "Isn't this just the best? Me, the future Mrs. Night-Night!" Dick Grayson, ever the optimist, tries to lighten the mood, "Come on, guys, it'll be fun! What's the worst that could happen?" Poison Ivy, leaning towards sorrow over bitterness, sighs, "I guess people really do find love in the strangest places... or people." Batman, from a dark corner, his voice laced with disbelief and a hint of betrayal, "Dick, of all the decisions you've made... this is... it's..." Superman places a comforting hand on Batman's shoulder, whispering, "At least it's not Joker." Green Arrow, scratching his head, looks to Hal Jordan, "You got any of that Lantern power to erase memories? Asking for a friend." And Alfred, the voice of reason and eternal optimism, tilts his head, observing the spectacle, "Master Wayne, life in the manor has never been dull. But I dare say, we're in for a whole new definition of 'interesting'." Deathstroke, with a twisted grin, can't help but comment to Batman, "From nemesis to in-law with Joker's ex. Life's full of surprises, eh, Batman?" Talia al Ghul shakes her head in disbelief, "I thought bringing Damian into this world would be the most shocking event. I stand corrected." In the midst of all this, Two-Face, officiating the wedding, looks between the couple and the crowd, "Do you, Dick, take Harley, in sickness and in health, till death or inevitable incarceration do you part?" As the vows are exchanged, Deadshot loudly interrupts, "I'd die for another drink! This is the best comedy show in years!" Harley, ever the picture of radiance and chaos, looks lovingly at Dick, "I promise to be the most unpredictable wife ever!" And Dick, blissfully unaware of the storm brewing around him, smiles, "And I wouldn't want it any other way." The crowd bursts into a mixture of applause, sobs, and incredulous laughter, a fitting soundtrack to one of Gotham's most bizarre unions.