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“Make a black comedy story here...Dick Grayson getting ready to marry Harley Quin” (2 conversations)
fanfiction
toxic
1 turn
Mar 26, 2024 at 9:18 AM PDT
United States
, California
USER
Make a black comedy story here...Dick Grayson getting ready to marry Harley Quinn here in Gotham's cathedral...decorations...food...church and wedding music played by Zatanna figuring as she figures...its the perfect time to practice smiling...always a good time to practice smiling...like right now...as she reminds herself that funeral and wedding music are two different things.........there is a heavily drunk Jason Todd and a heavily drunk Stephanie Brown as well......as Stephanie drunkenly thinks...wait...if Harley marries Dick...then...that doesn't mean Harley is 'family' now?..and Jason's response?..jugs the whole damn bottle......Barbara Gordon is there on wheelchair as well...with an eye-twitch...forced smile on her face......she is definitely not thinking her past relationships with Dick...no way...Dinah whispering to Vixen that according to Huntress...Dick is NOT being mind-controlled...and Tim mumbling about not having enough coffee to forget this moment...perhaps coffee + alcohol...a daring synthesis...Damian and Cassandra not there for the wedding...Poison Ivy sighing...well...Harley and Nightwing...who would have thought...as Poison Ivy used to date Harley...but...alas...hmph......Killer Frost is here if only because to see Batman seethe...and Catwoman can only imagine how Batman is feeling right now...all the while Clayface is just there to see the wedding......Signal trying to recall that one technique he learned to see if it was a dream or not......and Batwoman sighing...so this is happening.........while Cyborg just eats the food...prepared by Wally West who is in fact internally screaming right now...but hey...food is food...Superboy thinks so too...figuring if he eats enough...maybe he can digest the idea that Dick is marrying Harley Quinn ...Beast Boy agrees...while Huntress grumbling about this wedding...then deciding to eat as well...maybe if she eats enough or all of the food and drink all the alcohol...she'll be too busy dieting to forget this wedding ever happened......while Raven sighs............Donna blinking rapidly...Cassie Sandmark realizing no...this is NOT a dream......Starfire thinning his lips...Dick marrying Harley Quinn...very well then...as Starfire quietly sighs...as she knows of her history with Dick...but if Dick is truly happy with this...while Garth and Arsenal debate on getting the drinks too and getting drunk like Jason Todd...only for Garth to realize he can't get drunk easily...but Arsenal can...and the priest there is well...Two-Face......and Batman is in the crowd...seething...like sure...Dick's went out with a lot of women...including Starfire and Barbara...but...THIS?........and Superman simply comforts Batman is all...and Green Arrow stroking his beard...asking Hal Jordan to punch him...just in case he's dreaming right now...while Alfred...more or less...respects Dick's decision...but acknowledges that life at Wayne Manor will be very...interesting...from now on......and Deathstroke is there...Nightwing's nemesis...as he wonders if this will change their dynamics...because...of all the things...Dick marrying Harley...the lady associated with the Joker who killed Jason Todd...well...as Deathstroke quietly chuckles...because maybe...Grayson really became the 'I can fix her' to Harley Quinn...and seeing Batman seethe and cope?..worth it..........and Talia Al Ghul is there...a flicker of surprised contemplation...as she too hears from her spy...Dick Grayson is in fact...not being coerced by any of them...Dick really wants to marry Harley Quinn....as Wonder Woman grimly smiles at the wedding...while Deadshot laughs loudly as he gets a drink.... add black comedy dialogues
CHATBOT
As the absurd ensemble of Gotham's finest and most notorious gather under the grand arches of the cathedral, the air buzzes with a mix of disbelief and poorly disguised amusement. Zatanna, in her role as the unlikely wedding musician, strikes a chord on her harp, only to grimace. "Always a good time to practice smiling," Zatanna murmurs to herself, casting an eye over towards Barbara Gordon, whose eye twitch is becoming more pronounced by the minute. "And a better time to remember that 'Here Comes the Bride' and 'The Funeral March' are not interchangeable." Meanwhile, at the back of the cathedral, a heavily drunk Jason Todd raises his bottle in a mock toast. Stephanie Brown, equally intoxicated, squints at him, attempting to untangle her thoughts. "Wait, if Harley marries Dick... then that means she's 'family' now?" Stephanie slurs, her voice echoing slightly too loud. Jason, without missing a beat, chugs the remainder of his bottle and sighs. "I'm beginning to think my resurrection was a cosmic prank." At the front, Poison Ivy leans over to whisper to Killer Frost. "Harley and Nightwing... Who would've thought?" Killer Frost smirks. "I'm just here to see Batman's face. You think he'll smile if we all collectively imagine it hard enough?" Catwoman, overhearing them, adds, "Darling, Batman smiling at this wedding would be more shocking than the wedding itself." Across the room, Tim Drake is silently making a coffee plus alcohol concoction, muttering to himself, "This is not happening. This is the caffeine deprivation. That's it." Nearby, Dinah whispers to Vixen, watching Cyborg enjoy the food prepared by an internally screaming Wally West. "At least someone's having a good time. I bet Cyborg's internal systems can't process the weirdness level of this wedding." Vixen giggles, "Well, food is food, and drama is drama. And this," she gestures around, "is premium-level drama." Amid the congregation, Raven merely sighs, a deep, soulful sound that seems to capture the general sentiment, "This is... a lot." As the ceremony progresses, Two-Face, doubling as the priest, flips his coin before starting, "We are gathered here... on a rather unique occasion." A smirk curls on his lips. "Let's hope this union has better odds than my coin." In the crowd, Batman is indeed seething, with Superman patting his shoulder in an attempt to offer some form of comfort. "This is worse than the time he wore those disco Nightwing costumes," Batman grumbles. Superman, ever the optimist, offers, "Well, at least the reception should be... interesting." Green Arrow nudges Hal Jordan. "If you're not dreaming, I'm entering the Speedy's 'tightest archery costume' contest. Punch me now, please." Alfred, watching everything unfold, simply sighs. "Master Wayne's family dinners just got even more interesting." And in a corner, Deathstroke can't help but chuckle to himself. "This is better than any contract. Watching Batman squirm at the hands of love? Priceless." Talia Al Ghul stands apart, a small smirk playing on her lips. "Love truly knows no bounds. Or sense, it seems." Wonder Woman, standing tall amidst the chaos, offers a stoic smile. "May their love be as enduring as the trials they will undoubtedly face." And Deadshot, never one to miss an opportunity for revelry, raises his glass high. "To the newlyweds! May your lives be as lively and unexpected as this gathering!" As the improbable union of Dick Grayson and Harley Quinn is sealed, the room fills with a cacophony of applause, laughter, and a few resigned sighs. Because in Gotham, even weddings are anything but ordinary.