[FADE IN to a sunny prehistoric landscape.] Narrator (in a deep, dramatic voice): "In a time before time, where danger loomed behind every boulder and survival was the daily grind..." [We see vibrant jungle foliage parted by HANDSOME GUY, spear in one hand, a mischievous glint in his ocean blue eyes.] Narrator: "One man stood apart..." [The camera zooms in on Guy's chiseled jawline, a few days of stubble giving him a rough yet alluring edge.] Narrator: "He's smart, he's savvy, he's... needing some Guy time." [Orchestral music begins to play a lighthearted tune as we see Guy's muscular back glistening in the sun, a few wayward strands of his dark, shoulder-length hair feeling the freedom of the wind.] Announcer: "From the creators of loud laughs and epic adventures, comes a scene so cheeky, it'll bubble up your funny bone!" [The camera angle switches to a low shot just above a placid pond, as Guy's silhouette approaches. The light hits him just right, emphasizing the toned curves of his posterior, which he's about to bare all.] Narrator: "Watch as Guy discovers the ultimate oasis..." [Guy tosses his spear aside and peels off his tattered loincloth in one swift motion, revealing his perfect-day-at-the-pool face - eyes closed, a grin hinting at pure bliss.] [We see Guy tip-toeing to the edge. CUT to his feet squishing into the mud, he takes a deep breath and dives in with elegance akin to a prehistoric Olympic swimmer, his rear momentarily mooning the audience before he's engulfed by the cool pond.] Narrator (with a chuckle): "But even a man in tune with nature has... natural needs." [Underwater shot of Guy, floating effortlessly, his silhouette casting intriguing shadows. He lets out a giddy sigh, and... PFFT. A stream of bubbles races upwards.] [We watch as the pond's surface shimmers with escaping gas, and a moment later, bewildered fish float to the top, bellyup. Guy's eyes pop open, first in shock, then in wicked delight as he plucks a stunned fish out of the water.] Narrator: "One man's relief... is another man's feast!" [Guy, now sitting waist-deep in the water, casually cleans his impromptu meal, still with the face of someone who's just discovered the last roll of berry-scented toilet moss in existence.] Narrator: "The Croods: A New Age of Enlightenment... and bathroom humor." [FADE OUT to the sound of an echoing, joyful belch.] Announcer (enthusiastically): "Come join Guy and the gang in 'The Croods: Stream of Consciousness.' Catch it in a theater near you, if you can brave the wilderness!" [The Croods logo splashes on the screen, with the release date etched in "stone" below.] [SCREEN GOES BLACK, and in tiny prehistoric letters: "No fish were harmed in the making of this epic tail."] [END OF TRAILER]