[The scene opens on Shrek, in all his green and ogre-y glory, bathing in a pond. Water droplets cling to his matted fur and water weeds dangle from his ears. He is scrubbing his back with a loofah that looks suspiciously like Donkey's tail. Suddenly, he releases a thunderous fart into the water, causing several fish to float lifelessly to the surface.] Shrek: (sniffing the air) Ah, now that's the stench I've been looking for! [The camera zooms in on Shrek's face as he unleashes a contented belch.] Voice Over: Do you love the smell of rotting fish carcasses? Do you long for the odor of swamp gas and cow manure? [Shrek happily starts splashing in the water, sending ripples across the pond.] Voice Over: Introducing Ineau de Shrek, the fragrance for those who aren't afraid to stand out from the crowd. [Shrek climbs out of the pond, water cascading off his body. The camera pans over his lumpy, naked physique, lingering on his ample belly and drooping bum.] Shrek: (grinning at the camera) Ladies, don't you want a man who smells like onions and fungus? Voice Over: Ineau de Shrek, because why smell like roses when you can smell like a swamp? [Shrek takes a deep whiff of his armpit, then gives the camera a thumbs-up.] Shrek: Ineau de Shrek. Get it now, or be forever smellin' like a Barbie doll.