**Please be aware, this story will include humor that some might find a bit crude.** Once upon a time in the enchanted land of Far Far Away, after a particularly grueling quest to save yet another princess from yet another tower, Sir Arthur Pendragon and his unlikely companion, Shrek the ogre, stumbled upon a serene pond nestled in the heart of an emerald forest. "Ah, finally," sighed Arthur, wiping the sweat from his chiseled brow, his knightly muscles gleaming in the sun, "a chance to relax these royal limbs." Shrek, whose physique was rather more 'rouge gourde' than Greek god, grunted in agreement. "Sounds good to me, Artie. Me swamp doesn't have a spa, but this'll do." With little ceremony, Arthur disrobed, revealing a toned and tanned body honed by years of yeoman service. With a majestic dive befitting a king-to-be, he slipped into the cool waters, surfacing with an exultant splash. Shrek, watching this display, shrugged his broad, mossy shoulders and shimmied out of his tunic, his green skin doing a poor impression of a sun-kissed glow. He belly-flopped into the pond with a ground-shaking 'SPLOOSH,' sending waves lapping at the banks. Side by side, they floated, each in their own world of relaxation. Shrek closed his yellow eyes, the muck and mud of his daily life washing away, while Arthur's gaze was lost in the dappled light playing across the water. Suddenly, a low gurgling rumble interrupted the tranquility, and Arthur wrinkled his nose, glancing sidelong at Shrek. "Did the earth move for you too, Artie?" Shrek asked, a sly smirk broadening across his face. Before Arthur could reply, bubbles erupted around Shrek, and a sulfurous stench filled the air. The water churned as fish, unfortunate enough to be downstream, went belly-up, their final thoughts undoubtedly questioning the dietary choices of ogres. "Blimey, Shrek! That's horrid," exclaimed Arthur, though a peculiar twinkle in his eye betrayed his true sentiments. "But, in a strange way, it's... quite impressive." Shrek, a little proud and a lot amused, let out a chuckle. "Better out than in, I always say!" Arthur couldn't help but laugh, the absurdity of the situation washing over him like a second, slightly more odorous, wave. "Well, I suppose if this knight thing doesn't work out, you could always have a career as a bio-weapon." "Hey, it's all natural," Shrek protested, grinning. "I'm just sharing a bit of my ogre charm with the world." They continued to luxuriate in the pond, the stink somehow mingling with the scent of the wildflowers on the breeze. Each fart became a symphony of their blossoming friendship, a testament to the strange ways in which camaraderie can form even in the most unconventional of circumstances. As the sun began to dip below the treetops, casting long golden rays on the water, Shrek and Arthur emerged from the pond cleansed and relaxed, though the fish might disagree. With newfound appreciation for each other's eccentricities, they realized that beauty--or in this case, attraction--truly does lie in the nose of the beholder.