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toxic
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Mar 26, 2024 at 9:24 AM PDT
United States
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Make a black comedy story here...Dick Grayson getting ready to marry Harley Quinn here in Gotham's cathedral...decorations...food...church and wedding music played by Zatanna figuring as she figures...its the perfect time to practice smiling...always a good time to practice smiling...like right now...as she reminds herself that funeral and wedding music are two different things.........there is a heavily drunk Jason Todd and a heavily drunk Stephanie Brown as well......as Stephanie drunkenly thinks...wait...if Harley marries Dick...then...that doesn't mean Harley is 'family' now?..and Jason's response?..jugs the whole damn bottle......Barbara Gordon is there on wheelchair as well...with an eye-twitch...forced smile on her face......she is definitely not thinking her past relationships with Dick...no way...Dinah whispering to Vixen that according to Huntress...Dick is NOT being mind-controlled...and Tim mumbling about not having enough coffee to forget this moment...perhaps coffee + alcohol...a daring synthesis...Damian and Cassandra not there for the wedding...Poison Ivy sighing...well...Harley and Nightwing...who would have thought...as Poison Ivy used to date Harley...but...alas...hmph......Killer Frost is here if only because to see Batman seethe...and Catwoman can only imagine how Batman is feeling right now...all the while Clayface is just there to see the wedding......Signal trying to recall that one technique he learned to see if it was a dream or not......and Batwoman sighing...so this is happening.........while Cyborg just eats the food...prepared by Wally West who is in fact internally screaming right now...but hey...food is food...Superboy thinks so too...figuring if he eats enough...maybe he can digest the idea that Dick is marrying Harley Quinn ...Beast Boy agrees...while Huntress grumbling about this wedding...then deciding to eat as well...maybe if she eats enough or all of the food and drink all the alcohol...she'll be too busy dieting to forget this wedding ever happened......while Raven sighs............Donna blinking rapidly...Cassie Sandmark realizing no...this is NOT a dream......Starfire thinning his lips...Dick marrying Harley Quinn...very well then...as Starfire quietly sighs...as she knows of her history with Dick...but if Dick is truly happy with this...while Garth and Arsenal debate on getting the drinks too and getting drunk like Jason Todd...only for Garth to realize he can't get drunk easily...but Arsenal can...and the priest there is well...Two-Face......and Batman is in the crowd...seething...like sure...Dick's went out with a lot of women...including Starfire and Barbara...but...THIS?........and Superman simply comforts Batman is all...and Green Arrow stroking his beard...asking Hal Jordan to punch him...just in case he's dreaming right now...while Alfred...more or less...respects Dick's decision...but acknowledges that life at Wayne Manor will be very...interesting...from now on......and Deathstroke is there...Nightwing's nemesis...as he wonders if this will change their dynamics...because...of all the things...Dick marrying Harley...the lady associated with the Joker who killed Jason Todd...well...as Deathstroke quietly chuckles...because maybe...Grayson really became the 'I can fix her' to Harley Quinn...and seeing Batman seethe and cope?..worth it..........and Talia Al Ghul is there...a flicker of surprised contemplation...as she too hears from her spy...Dick Grayson is in fact...not being coerced by any of them...Dick really wants to marry Harley Quinn....as Wonder Woman grimly smiles at the wedding...while Deadshot laughs loudly as he gets a drink.... add black comedy dialogues
CHATBOT
In the grand Gothic architecture of Gotham's Cathedral, the air buzzed not just with the unusual choice of wedding music, courtesy of Zatanna trying to remember the difference between "Here Comes the Bride" and "The Funeral March," but also with quips and banter that could only belong to the superhero community on its most bizarre day yet. Jason Todd, heavily drowning his sorrows and disbelief in a bottle, squints at the altar. "Dick's getting hitched to Harley Freaking Quinn. There's not enough liquor in the world for this..." Stephanie Brown, equally inebriated and leaning heavily against him, slurs, "Does this mean Harley's, like, Bat-family now? Coz that's gonna make Thanksgiving super weird." Barbara Gordon, rolling her eyes from her wheelchair, forces a smile which edges dangerously close to a grimace. "Let's just hope their first dance isn't to 'Mad Love,'" she mutters, purposely ignoring the elephant in the room--her complex past with Dick. Meanwhile, Tim Drake is seen whispering to a flask of coffee with a shot of something stronger, "If I drink enough, maybe I'll forget. Or hallucinate something saner. Like Killer Moth marrying a lamp." Poison Ivy, staring into the middle distance with a glass of champagne in hand, can't help but let out a pensive sigh. "Harley and Nightwing. Of all the plot twists nature could've cooked up..." Dinah, leaning towards Vixen, whispers while nodding towards Huntress, "You know, Helena swears Dick's not under any mind control. And I thought my love life was complicated." Batman stands amidst the congregation, his seething almost palpable, which gives way to low murmurs among the guests. Catwoman leans in, "Ever think we'd see the day?" she teases. Batman just grunts, "I've seen Dick make some questionable choices... but this? Marrying the Joker's ex? I need a vacation." Two-Face, performing the ceremony, raises both eyebrows, "Do you, Richard Grayson, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, in madness and in sanity, for trickster or for worse?" A flip of his coin. "I do," he grins. Superman places a comforting hand on Batman's shoulder. "At least the reception will be interesting," he offers. Alfred, ever the stoic butler, comments quietly to no one in particular, "Master Wayne did say he wanted more excitement at Wayne Manor. Though, I suspect this wasn't quite what he had in mind." Deathstroke, standing off to the side and watching the proceedings with an amused smirk, leans over to Talia Al Ghul. "You know, I've tried to kill the guy more times than I can count. But this? This is a fate I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy." And Talia, eyes narrowed in thought, murmurs back, "And to think, Father believed Batman would bring the most drama to our lives." As the "I do's" are exchanged, Deadshot, by the bar, raises his glass high. "To the newlyweds! May their nights be full of explosives--of every kind!" Indeed, as Harley Quinn and Dick Grayson, now married, turn to face their future together, the eclectic crowd of Gotham's finest and not-so-fine know deep down that life in Gotham just got a little bit stranger. And definitely more entertaining. "Smile," Zatanna reminds herself, playing the wedding march with a magical twist, "Because at the end of the day, you've got to find humor in the chaos." And oh, what chaos it promises to be.