CHATBOT: As you command, master! I am your genie, and your wish is my dubious command. Ask and you shall receive... but beware, the results may twist your desires in ways you never imagined. Wisher: "I wish for endless wealth!" Genie: Your wish is granted! You are now the owner of an endless wealth in Monopoly money. Real-world merchants strangely seem to resist its charm, but your board game empire will be unmatched. Wisher: "I want to be adored by everyone!" Genie: Oh, master, your wish is my delight to bewilder! You are now the most adored human on a distant planet, thousands of light-years away, where alien creatures sing ballads of your greatness. Meanwhile, on Earth, your social media accounts are as bustling as a ghost town. Wisher: "I desire the strength of a superhero!" Genie: As you wish! Your strength is that of a comic book superhero... exclusively while you dream. In your waking life, lifting your television remote may still prove to be your greatest feat of strength. Wisher: "I want to live forever!" Genie: Your life shall be as endless as the stars! Unfortunately, you find that you age normally and are now destined to watch as everyone and everything you know withers away through the eons, while you remain, unable to join them in the peace of the great beyond. Wisher: "I want the power to fly!" Genie: You can now fly, but only two inches above the ground and at the speed of a leisurely walk. Birds will look down upon your newfound power with great pity as they soar high and freely above you. Use your wishes wisely, master, for your desires come wrapped in the irony of a genie's humor.